Life as We Climb: How Women Can Build Each Other Up and Break Through Barriers
From the desk of Alexa Scalzi, Co-Founder & Chief Revenue Officer:
Growing up with sisters and being raised by a single mom didn’t just shape who I am—it defined how I see the world, especially when it comes to women supporting each other. My mom was a force of resilience, constantly showing us that even when life isn’t fair, we have the choice to stand together and make it better. That lesson is something I’ve carried with me throughout my entire career.
Today, women in leadership are redefining what it means to lead and rewriting the rules in a world that has a history of underestimating us. Only 25% of senior leadership roles are held by women. But instead of dwelling on what’s lacking, I see the potential for change, a future where women hold more leadership roles and shape the world in their image.
We hear it all the time—women can (and should) break through barriers. But what’s often missing is the “how.”
For me, it’s never been about doing it on my own. It’s about showing up for each other—whether in the boardroom, at home, or in those moments in-between.
The True Power of Mentorship
Mentorship has played a pivotal role in my career, and I’ve been lucky to have some incredible leaders guide me along the way. My first real mentor was a boss who was structured, tough, and had sky-high expectations—but she was also fair. She was the first person to show me that you can be kind and lead with empathy without compromising results. That balance between kindness and strength is something I’ve worked to embody in my own leadership style. And perhaps most importantly, she taught me that if you don’t advocate for yourself, no one else will.
But here’s the thing: Mentorship changes, and it should. The mentors who guide you early on may not be the same ones you need later—and that’s okay. Different stages require different perspectives.
That’s why mentors outside your industry matter. Some of my best mentors were from different fields, and that’s where real learning happens. Getting advice from someone with a completely different vantage point can open up new ways of thinking you’d never discover on your own. Whether it’s someone in a creative industry, tech, or even entrepreneurship, you’ll find that the lessons on leadership, resilience, and growth can translate across any career.
And just as mentorship is about finding people who help you grow, it’s about giving back, too. We’re all in different stages of our careers, but we have the power to lift each other up. That’s how we break barriers—not just by pushing through them ourselves but by helping others do the same.
Why Women Leaders Don’t Fit Your “Expectations”
There’s no shortage of misconceptions about women in leadership. We’ve all heard the stereotypes—women are too emotional, mothers can’t handle the demands of senior roles, or we’re somehow “less capable” because we have to juggle personal and professional lives.
Guess what? Emotions don’t make us weak—they make us strong. Leading with empathy and emotional intelligence is a power move. It means we’re tuned into our teams, we understand what drives them, and we know how to build a culture that’s about more than just hitting KPIs.
I’ve seen firsthand how asking a simple question—How are you, really?—opens doors to deeper connections and stronger results. People work harder when they feel seen, heard, and valued. And I’ve built my leadership style around that.
Balancing the Unseen Load
The mental load often flies under the radar, but its impact is undeniable. Whether it’s remembering to buy a teammate a birthday cake or organizing the company retreat, women carry an invisible weight of planning, managing, and anticipating what needs to be done—both at work and at home. These tasks, often referred to as “office housework,” range from administrative duties to menial but necessary jobs that keep the workplace running smoothly. And while it’s not exclusive to women, the numbers tell us that women disproportionately bear this burden.
According to the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development, women in America spend nearly twice as much time on unpaid work as men—about 4.5 hours compared to 2.78. And this imbalance doesn’t stop at home; it follows us into the workplace. Studies show that women do 29% more office housework than white men, often being asked to volunteer or simply stepping in to ensure the task gets done.
But here’s the truth—I love doing the expected, oftentimes invisible work. It’s what builds trust and relationships in ways that spreadsheets never will. It’s how I connect with my team, my clients, and the people I care about. But that doesn’t mean I have to do everything. Delegating isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a strength. It lets you focus on what you do best while giving others a chance to step up.
What doesn’t always get talked about is the unspoken expectation that women will just naturally handle these tasks—at work, at home, everywhere.
It’s okay to enjoy the extra touch, but it’s also okay to say, “I don’t need to be the one to do this.”
We need to give ourselves permission to let go of some of these responsibilities and delegate without guilt.
I’m still learning how to strike a balance that works for me, knowing that sometimes stepping back from these “invisible” tasks allows me to show up in even bigger ways.
Owning Your Mistakes
I’ve made my share of mistakes—plenty of them. But mistakes are a part of the process. I used to think that messing up meant I wasn’t cut out for leadership. Now, I see it differently. You can’t grow if you don’t make mistakes along the way.
The reality is, action—even if messy or imperfect—is better than inaction. Sitting still because you’re afraid of making the wrong move keeps you stuck. Taking that first step, even if you’re not entirely sure where it will lead, is what moves you forward.
Mistakes don’t define you—how you respond does. Every mistake has made me stronger. The key is to own it, learn from it, and continue.
There’s grace in that. Giving yourself room to evolve, to be human, and to admit when you’ve gotten it wrong is a strength, not a flaw. Leadership isn’t about being perfect; it’s about showing up, learning from your failures, and doing better next time. That’s how you grow, not just as a leader but as a person.
I’m still learning every day. And if there’s one thing I’ve taken away from all of this, it’s that growth doesn’t come from getting it right all the time. It comes from taking risks, owning your mistakes, and using them as fuel to keep moving forward.
Lifting Women as We Climb
I can’t talk about women in leadership without addressing the reality of the gender pay gap. It’s reported that women earn only 82% of what men make—a measly improvement of 2% since 2002. At this rate, it’s going to take 257 years to close that gap. That’s not just a stat; it’s a wake-up call.
So what do we, as leaders, do about it?
We can start by asking more questions, creating space for honest dialogue, and challenging the status quo that’s kept these gaps in place for far too long. Women need—and deserve—more than just a seat at the table. We need to reshape the table entirely.
Here’s where we can start:
- Provide Flexible Working Conditions: Flexibility isn’t a luxury; it’s essential for attracting and retaining top talent. According to the International Workplace Group (IWG), nearly three-quarters of women (72%) would look for a new job if their employer took away hybrid work options. Flexibility allows women to balance professional growth with family and personal responsibilities. It’s time to prioritize hybrid and remote work—not just as an option but as a standard practice that helps women thrive.
- Create Mentorship Opportunities: The fact that 63% of women have never had a formal mentor? That’s a problem. Women need mentorship to navigate career growth and create support systems in industries where too few women are in leadership roles. Mentorship opens doors, builds confidence, and helps women step into positions of influence. We need to be intentional about fostering these relationships.
- Challenge the Status Quo in Male-Dominated Industries: The status quo doesn’t change on its own. It requires active effort from leaders—both men and women—to call out inequities and push for policies that promote diversity at the top. We need more women in leadership, and that means creating environments where their ideas are heard, valued, and acted on.
We can’t afford to wait 257 years for equality. Let’s start making that change now.
Be Yourself and Lead the Way
You don’t have to fit into anyone’s mold to be an effective leader. You don’t have to lead the way others expect you to or pretend to be something you’re not to fit into some outdated version of what leadership looks like.
The most effective leaders don’t check all the traditional boxes. They’re the ones who show up as their full, authentic selves, with all their quirks, strengths, and imperfections. When you lead from that place, people notice. They’re drawn to your honesty, your vulnerability, and your willingness to show up as you.
We all need support from others. Seeking out those connections is so, so important. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need—whether that’s advice, a sounding board, or even just a reminder that you’re on the right path. And as much as we seek that support, we have to be ready to give it, too. When we mentor others, we create a ripple effect that can change the face of leadership for generations to come.
But more than anything, I want you to know this: It’s really, really okay to be you. Your unique perspective, your leadership style, and your voice are needed now more than ever. So, show up unapologetically. Advocate for yourself the way you’d advocate for others. Take up space. And lead in the way that only you can.
Because when we do that—when we embrace who we are and help others do the same—we don’t just lead; we redefine leadership itself.
Want to connect or continue the conversation? Feel free to check out my journey on LinkedIn for more insights on leadership and growth.